Which Comics Are The Best Books To Buy?: New Superhero Comic Book & Graphic Novel Ratings & Reviews
[ Marvel / DC Comics / Image / Indie ] 08-21-19
Superman: Year One 02
Reviews were at best mixed for the first issue. Some people REALLY hated it. I kind of liked it. It wasn’t great but I found it interesting. There was an attempted gang rape of “Lana Lang” that was completely unnecessary though. This issue straight-up sucks. The last issue ended with “Clark” deciding to join the Navy. It was definitely a questionable idea. It raises implications especially since the writer is “Frank Miller” and he definitely has some controversial views. Controversy would at least be interesting, and unfortunately, interesting is one thing this comic doesn’t want to be.
We begin with “Clark” in the Navy and he’s good at everything obviously because he’s “Superman”. Not needing to sleep, he one day he goes outside on his base at night and he sees mermaids in the water nearby. A commanding officer who already knows about the mermaids catches him and tells him to keep the mermaids a secret. Later “Clark” is at a bar talking to some Black chick named “Shari”. Some guy approaches them and tries to pick up “Shari” but she isn’t interested. “Clark,” tells the guy to leave, and the guy tries to punch him but “Clark” blocks the punch hurting his hand. “Kill you. Kill you bad” is some of this guy’s dialog… This is what we’re dealing with here… When he gets back to his base “Clark” gets blamed for the bar fight that ensues. He’s forced to do a bunch of chores but what does it matter to him? He’s “Superman”. He doesn’t get tired and can do it all in a second if he wanted to.
One night “Clark” goes out into the water to find the mermaids. To be clear these are not traditional looking mermaids. They are much more “fishy”-looking. He finds a mermaid and follows her underwater until he finds their underwater kingdom, Atlantis. There he finds that an experimental sub has crashed into one of their castles. “Clark” helps the mermaids by moving the rubble and fixing things. The mermaid “Clark” followed is the princess of Atlantis, “Lori”. She wants to bone, but “Clark” is like “Nah, I gotta go”.
As “Clark” returns to land we get shown an excerpt from the journal of the commanding officer that “Clark” talked with about the mermaid. We learn the officer’s name is “Jacob Kurtzberg”. “Jacob” saw “Clark” as he returned and he’s envious that “Clark” got to be with “the Angels” and suspects he might have powers. Hours later “Clark” does three different fight-based training exercises. Two fighting with one Black guy and another with a second Black guy. He’s “Superman” and he wants to get promoted so he wins. Early morning the next day, “Clark” gets sent on a mission. Some terrorists have hijacked a ship and he’s part of a team to stop them. “Clark” refuses to kill anyone and one terrorist tries to use a grenade but “Clark” absorbs the explosion with his hands. “Clark” ends up getting an honorable discharge because he refused to kill. At least Miller didn’t “Zack Snyder” it up and get the killing part wrong.
As he’s leaving the base “Jacob” basically tells “Clark” he knows he has powers and to hone them and use them responsibly. “Clark” then goes directly back into the water to visit Atlantis again. He then finds and bones “Lori” underwater. “Clark” falls asleep and when he wakes up “Lori” is gone but she telepathically tells him she’s waiting for him and for him to “wear his best suit”. “Clark” puts on his “Superman” outfit, and he approaches the castle from before. We then learn that “Lori’s” father is Poseidon. Here things go completely off the rails. As he approaches a giant guard attacks “Superman” but “Superman” uses his heat vision on it and then he can telepathically control it or something. Wtf?!
“Clark” then enters Poseidon’s chamber. Poseidon doesn’t like “Clark” because he wants to have some incestuous relationship with his daughter. I’ll fast track the rest because it’s all so Goddamn stupid and tedious. Poseidon sends three of his men at “Superman”, then a “Kraken”-like monster, then a bigger “Kraken”-like monster and none of them do shit because it’s fucking “Superman”. Poseidon then leaves making “Superman” the new king of Atlantis. Wtf?!
This was terrible. Most of the story is pointless and where it isn’t pointless, it’s bizarre and not in a good way. I didn’t even get into how almost everything is repeated over and over again. It makes the dumb story so much more annoying to read. Even “John Romita Jr’s” art (who is normally a great artist) seems extremely half-assed in this issue. C-. Even if you’re planning to read this series, you can safely skip this issue.
Recommendation : One Of The Worst Books To Buy