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[ Marvel / DC Comics / Image / Indie ] 10-02-19 House Of X #6
House Of X #6
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐗-𝐌𝐞𝐧 𝐂𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐔𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐃𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐬 & 𝐌𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥 𝐓𝐨 𝐆𝐞𝐭 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐓𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐄𝐭𝐡𝐧𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐈𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐒𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭, 𝐁𝐞𝐞𝐫 & 𝐅𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 🍻🎆
It’s hard to not sound like a broken record with this comic, but the comic itself is a broken record so it’s unavoidable. “Xavier” uses his telepathy along with “Cerebro” to make the announcement of his “Krakoan” drug extortion scheme now that “Krakoa” is now officially an ethnostate. Everything about this is the exact opposite of anything “Xavier” would have ever stood for. Mutants, of course, have had all-mutant nations before but the circumstances were different though, and the text wasn’t as explicit about it being some type of ethnostate. In this announcement, we learn the “Krakoan” drugs (which once again I have to point out make no sense) cure even more things like ALS. Everything about this announcement is cringy and terrible. It’s a real “nyah nyah we got the drugs” type of thing. None of this is new though we saw this announcement before or at least pieces of it. So far we have nothing new except more about the stupid drugs that make no sense and it’s cringy and out of character.
By the way, I almost forgot this part. Not only are the drugs stupid and make no sense but there’s no point to the drugs in the story. At the end of the day, “Emma” used her telepathy to make sure “Krakoa” was recognized as a nation so they didn’t need the drugs. So let’s go back through this again. The drugs are stupid and make no sense. Using them to extort people is against anything the X-Men would ever stand for. The drugs serve no purpose in the story and putting them in Marvel Universe makes it way less realistic if we’re still supposed to believe this is the real timeline. Which I don’t.
In the announcement, there’s also this whole thing about our new nation of “Krakoa” claiming the right to other countries’ citizens just because they’re mutants. It’s absolute bullshit! This gets into what I think is one of the biggest problems “X-Men” comics and that’s using mutants as a metaphor and then stretching that metaphor way too far. Mutants are a good metaphor for minorities and misfits. From minorites this can be extended to race. When the idea of “mutants” as race get extended too far though you get this: the “X-men” forming an ethnostate filled with terrorists and criminals and using drugs along with mind control to ensure their ethnostate is recognized by the world. How far is this removed from the “X-men” mission statement of “fighting for the peaceful co-existence of humans and mutants”?!
Again I have to repeat myself, in the “Marvel” universe we understand that mutants would be part of every race, nation, gender, or any other sub-group of people that there are. It’s fine to say your nation will take in any mutant that wants to live there. That they can have automatic citizenship. You can’t fucking tell other nations that their citizens are under your laws though! Fuck you!
Not following me? Let’s try a thought experiment. Imagine there’s this magical island that’s found by some introverts. This magical island somehow was not within the boundaries of any nation on Earth. There might be more to it than that but just for the sake of argument let’s say no nation has any claim over this island and no one wants to claim it or whatever. Bottom line is, these introverts that found the island can have that Island free and clear. It’s theirs and let’s say those introverts then come up with some drugs that revolutionized medicine and they use that to extort their way into being to making “Introvert-topia” into a recognized nation by most of the world. Now imagine “Introvert-topia” tells every other country in the world “we have jurisdiction over your introvert citizens”. Imagine the kind of response this country would get. Imagine how justified they would be to shut the whole thing down especially when the madmen behind this place keep citing something that supposedly extroverts did to introverts when it was actually an introvert who did it. To be clear, and again I have to repeat myself, the “Genoshan” massacre was caused by “Cassandra Nova”. “Charles Xavier’s” twin sister. The other thing they keep citing was “M-Day” which was done by “Scarlet Witch” who at least at the time was believed to be a mutant. I think maybe they retconned it but whatever. The important thing is, it wasn’t something any human government did or sanctioned or anything. Oh, also operatives of this nation just decided to go in the space and destroy a defense system.
Maybe this is too fictional. So let’s say a Muslim country just out of nowhere announces that any onyone the of Islamic faith including any terrorist or Muslim criminal can’t be judged by your courts or governments anymore. Then they destroy your country’s air-defense system. They even invite all the world’s worst Muslim terrorists and criminals in their country and even put some of them in the government. One of which is a genocidal Madman and another is a guy guilty of crimes against nature (but he’s “sassy”). War wouldn’t just be justified it would be an obligation to the world’s security.
Speaking of which, do you remember that list of people that would be on this “Kroakoan” council that runs the government? Well now, we see the whole list except for the “Red King” but we already know it’s going to be “Kitty Pryde”. If you know anything about the history of her, you’d immediately see how that is incomprehensibly stupid. Otherwise, the list has nothing all that surprising on it except I feel like it’s kind of shitty “Cyclops” didn’t get a spot. He’s a “captain commander” which is something they describe for who’s in charge during war or something but still… Another one of these “captains commanders” is “Gorgon” who I think is a “Wolverine” villain. Tf?! Also, Apocalypse has a seat which is ridiculous, but so is Apocalypse even being allowed anywhere near the island so fuck it.
The first thing this Council comes up with three basic laws which are:
- Mutants can’t kill humans indiscriminately (which in this comic I’m actually kind of surprised by, but I guess there’re vestiges of real “X-Men” in here somewhere)
- Something boring about property that no one cares about. I think it just follows basic human laws or something like that.
- Then there’s an extremely cringey part between “Nightcrawler” and “Mystique” that leads to “make more mutants”. Which isn’t a fucking law.
Then the council decides how to punish a “Sabertooth” for killing people. The obvious answer is they should just imprison him. Then again, “Sabertooth” is more of a dick than pretty much anybody so I can understand just killing him. They come up with bullshit reasoning for not killing him that makes no sense and is stupid. So instead they do the most inhumane thing that could possibly think of which is permanent solitary confinement in a dark hole that “Krakoa” just kind of drags him into. So he’s going to escape eventually, and this is morally reprehensible in any way you could think of. Seriously, if you’re going to do this, then just let the humans put him in jail or kill him.
Then after all this, there’s not much more than a bunch of fireworks and small character moments. “Jean” and “Emma” share a beer. It looks like “Wolverine”, “Jean” and “Cyclops” set up a threesome (I’m joking here just to be clear). And that’s pretty much it. If this is supposed to be a separate series, that’s supposed to stand by itself almost nothing happens and this is a really anticlimactic ending. Stupid.
I can’t wait for all the fun technobabble we’ll have the big finale of “Powers Of X”. Even if somehow someway the big finale of “Powers Of X” is greatest thing ever the journey to get there was terrible, stupid, and against anything an “X-Men” comics should ever be about… And the sad part is.. The part that really really hits you in the stones… The relaunch looks even worse. Fuck! C-.
Recommendation: One Of Them Lesser Books You Can Buy