𝕎𝕙𝕚𝕔𝕙 ℂ𝕠𝕞𝕚𝕔𝕤 𝔸𝕣𝕖 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝔹𝕖𝕤𝕥 𝔹𝕠𝕠𝕜𝕤 𝕐𝕠𝕦 ℂ𝕒𝕟 𝔹𝕦𝕪?:

ɴᴇᴡ ꜱᴜᴘᴇʀʜᴇʀᴏ ᴄᴏᴍɪᴄ ʙᴏᴏᴋ & ɢʀᴀᴘʜɪᴄ ɴᴏᴠᴇʟ ʀᴀᴛɪɴɢꜱ & ʀᴇᴠɪᴇᴡꜱ

[ 𝙼𝚊𝚛𝚟𝚎𝚕 / 𝙳𝙲 𝙲𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚌𝚜 / 𝙸𝚖𝚊𝚐𝚎 / 𝙸𝚗𝚍𝚒𝚎 ]

10-30-19 Excalibur #1

Excalibur #1

 I’ve said this before but it needs reiterating “Apocalypse” is a genocidal madman. He is not a freedom fighter for mutants who is overly aggressive. He’s not someone who is merely for mutant supremacy. In fact, I would contend that “Apocalypse” doesn’t care about mutants at all. He’s completely agnostic about it. He is about who is strongest and that is it. That’s why “The Hulk” was one of his horsemen once. Not a mutant. Just one of the strongest. As we’ve seen in the “Age of Apocalypse” where “Apocalypse” ruled America if he had his way, he’d commit genocide on humans. He would put them in pens and systematically cull them. “Cull” being a nice word for murder here. So having “Apocalypse” as a member of an “X-team” is nothing less than insanity. It’s sick, and it’s obscene, but more importantly it’s stupid.

With that out of the way, the main thing that can be said about this comic is that it’s boring. There’s boring stuff with “Morgan Le Fay”. Boring stuff with “Captain Britain” and “Psylocke”… I mean “Elizabeth Braddock”. “Psylocke” is now the Asian woman that “Elizabeth Braddock” switched bodies with. Ya know the cool ninja “Psylocke” that we actually like. This comic is so boring and the storytelling is so poor that I imagine the pitch for it went something like this…

Editor: Hey you!

Writer: Were you talking to me?

Editor: Yeah, whatever. You’re writing “Excalibur” now

Writer: What?

Editor: You’re writing “Excalibur” and “Apocalypse” is on the team.

Writer: Wait, what are you talking about?

Editor: Also the boring British version of “Psylocke” is the leader and she’s “Captain Britain” now.

Writer: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What is going on here?!

Editor: You got a week to write it!

Writer: I’m going to need months to even attempt to think about how to make any of this make any sense!

Editor: Actually the schedule’s been bumped up you. You got three days! Also, do some “Prince symbol thing” with “Apocalypse”. I like Prince and I like genocidal madmen.

From here I’ll just give random bullet points from the plot because it’s too boring to go into.

• There’s a gate to “Otherworld/Camelot” (where “Morgan Le Fay” lives) that is blocked off in “Krakoa”. I think “Apocalypse” planted “Krakoa’s” magic fast travel flowers there and “Morgan Le Fay” is pissy about it.
• There’s some stuff with a coven in England that “Morgan Le Fay” threatens.
• “Jamie Braddock” is brought back to life on “Krakoa”. I don’t know much about him but he’s a villain and he’s a dick.
• “Captain Britain” is called to “Otherworld” to deal with the “Morgan Le Fay” thing and “Betsy” come with him. She changes into her costume with “Krakoan costume technology”. Wow, it there anything that the writers can’t use “Krokoa” to lazily explain?
• The “X-men” learn “Betsy” is in “Otherworld” and want to get her back. For some reason “Rogue” is asked by “Apocalypse” to “absorb” the gate. I have no fucking clue what the fuck this was supposed to do.
• “Captain Britain” and “Betsy” fight “Morgan Le Fay” and her minions and “Captain Britain” is taken under “Morgan Le Faye’s” spell. “Betsy” throws some “psychic sword” at the gate to “Krakoa” and that shatters it trapping her there supposedly.
• On the other side in “Krakoa” some kind of plant gets through the gate and it freezes “Rogue”.
• “Betsy” grabs “Captain Britain’s” amulet and becomes the new “Captain Britain”. This allows her to leave “Otherworld”.
• The main lady from the coven from before kills the other members of her coven and joins another coven.

This comic is the worst kind of bad. It’s not even “fun bad”. It’s just bland and hard to get through. Also, the art is nothing special. Fine, is about the most I can say about it. This is a really low C-.

Recommendation: One Of The Lesser Books You Can Buy